Going Loopy!
So being a parent is hard right? We all know that, but you don't actually know the full extent of hardness until your in the thick of it & it is to late to back out!
I'm the luckiest woman alive, I found myself a wonderful man to be my husband & Georgia's dad. He was not scared away by erratic, crazy, sleep deprived state I stayed in for at least 2 maybe 3 months. I would have run a mile if I was him!!! He took control when I was out of control.
Now I'm not a crier, I can keep the tears at bay at all times, no one likes ruined make up! But my god did I cry! I cried when I had to stay in hospital, I cried when we left hospital, cried when Georgia would just stare at me, cried that I couldn't clean my house, I even cried when Billie died on Home and Away! That's right a silly soapy show!!!
I really struggled in those first couple of months, I put SO much pressure on myself to be this amazing wonder woman who could do it all. I wanted to always look fresh faced, have a spotless house & a perfect baby. When you first get home everyone wants to come over and you're trying to figure out this parenting thing & trying to survive on very little sleep. What made it worse for me was I thought I was doing a pretty good job hiding the fact I was struggling but I clearly didn't because everyone kept telling me I am an amazing mum and I knew what they were doing, they were trying to pick me up, but it actually made it worse. In my head I didn't feel like an amazing mum & I put even more pressure on myself.
I also became so worried that people might think I'm becoming depressed & when I think about it I was worried that it would actually happen to me. I'm to much of a control freak, I wanted to have a handle on everything.
I now know it's totally ok to ask for help, as a matter of fact people love to help when it comes to babies! And you know what? If people come over and my house isn't spotless it doesn't matter! If they are going to judge you on having a sink full of dirty dishes when you've got a new born at home, they aren't worth having in your life! And if I look like I haven't slept in 3 weeks and I have bags on top of bags under my eyes, it's is probably because I haven't actually slept & I didn't have time to slap some make up on! IT'S OK!!!!
I found the first 3 months incredibly hard and it still is hard but I feel like I've got a much better grasp on things & I am actually feeling like an amazing mum!
I'm the luckiest woman alive, I found myself a wonderful man to be my husband & Georgia's dad. He was not scared away by erratic, crazy, sleep deprived state I stayed in for at least 2 maybe 3 months. I would have run a mile if I was him!!! He took control when I was out of control.
Now I'm not a crier, I can keep the tears at bay at all times, no one likes ruined make up! But my god did I cry! I cried when I had to stay in hospital, I cried when we left hospital, cried when Georgia would just stare at me, cried that I couldn't clean my house, I even cried when Billie died on Home and Away! That's right a silly soapy show!!!
I really struggled in those first couple of months, I put SO much pressure on myself to be this amazing wonder woman who could do it all. I wanted to always look fresh faced, have a spotless house & a perfect baby. When you first get home everyone wants to come over and you're trying to figure out this parenting thing & trying to survive on very little sleep. What made it worse for me was I thought I was doing a pretty good job hiding the fact I was struggling but I clearly didn't because everyone kept telling me I am an amazing mum and I knew what they were doing, they were trying to pick me up, but it actually made it worse. In my head I didn't feel like an amazing mum & I put even more pressure on myself.
I also became so worried that people might think I'm becoming depressed & when I think about it I was worried that it would actually happen to me. I'm to much of a control freak, I wanted to have a handle on everything.
I now know it's totally ok to ask for help, as a matter of fact people love to help when it comes to babies! And you know what? If people come over and my house isn't spotless it doesn't matter! If they are going to judge you on having a sink full of dirty dishes when you've got a new born at home, they aren't worth having in your life! And if I look like I haven't slept in 3 weeks and I have bags on top of bags under my eyes, it's is probably because I haven't actually slept & I didn't have time to slap some make up on! IT'S OK!!!!
I found the first 3 months incredibly hard and it still is hard but I feel like I've got a much better grasp on things & I am actually feeling like an amazing mum!
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